Party in the Freezer!

Having a second refrigerator is not a good idea. About 2 or 3 months ago, my youngest daughter came bouncing in through the garage door that led directly into the laundry room to tell me, “The fridge is not on.” Well…I figured this was a man-problem. We didn’t really use it…so I just ignored the fact.

A few days ago I actually trekked downstairs to the kid living room. I try not to do this often; this is their territory and I prefer not to see what it looks like.

I was very sorry I made that decision. A bunch of old cups, partially filled with who-knows-what, lemonade or juice…I don’t know, were scattered among various tables, and areas of the floor near couches and chairs. I may not have been able to identify the contents of the cups; what I DID know, however, fruit flies, my affliction, were buzzing around all of them! Still yet, more were submerged–drowned in the cups and mugs! I DETEST, and have absolutely no use for those…”Things.” It was torturous, but as quickly as I could muster, I gathered the cups and hurried them to the kitchen.

Photo by Egor Kamelev on

Let’s move-on to day two: I wake up and head for the kitchen. Gotta begin with a few cups of coffee, right? Well…I noticed I was swatting my arm at bugs like I was in the jungle or something. I thought, “wonderful… fruit flies in the kitchen.” No biggie; throw away the old banana, right? Wrong. There was no banana. And there was no old peach. No rotten potato. Not to mention, there were more than “a few” fruit flies. I was actually dodging them! This was not a good scene. My parents were visiting at the time, and I was yelling for anyone who would listen that I needed 10 bucks,immediately, to go buy some Raid. My mother and my husband were completely against using Raid. My husband is a chemist and he will not use any of that stuff in the house, and no round-up in the yard. (We can grow GREAT weeds) Mom said to “vacuum them up, it’s ‘fun.”

Well. Since I couldn’t make my coffee, I went to step two morning routine…time to pee. I went into my daughter’s bathroom, and there were fruit flies IN THERE TOO!! This is clearly not a joke anymore; we were being invaded. This time I threw a tantrum about getting some Raid. “Listen, I’ve lived in Florida and we LIVED on Raid, OK? We’re not gonna die, I’m not going to spray it ON your cereal, or IN your milk, but we HAVE to do something!”

Mom: “Get your vacuum out, that’s what I did at the cabin.”

Fine. I sucked a few up, and then luckily it was time to go to work.

The next day I was practically in tears. Those “Things” were everywhere. My college daughter came home from school to do laundry and couldn’t even go into our laundry room because there were so many you-know-whats. I VACUUMED FOR 5 OR 6 HOURS. Literally. First in the kitchen. Then in the bathroom. Then the other bathroom. Next I had to haul the monstrous Kirby into the laundry room. And then…it was time to start over in the kitchen again. Then the bathroom. Then the other bathroom. You get the idea. No joke. 5 hours. I had goosebumps the whole time. It absolutely gave me chills. (I must say, I did however, for a little while, feel like a Jedi with my big long hose!) I had googled fruit flies to see how to get rid of them. Bad idea. It showed them CLOSE-UP. They have red eyes! BIG red eyes. The internet said to vacuum. And to “find the source.” So I sucked, and I cried, and I sucked, and I called Dave and yelled at him, then I sucked some more, then I called my mom and yelled at her. She said, “Look for a potato. There MUST be a potato, you HAVE to find the source.” Ugh.

So I looked for a potato. No potato. I had cleaned and scrubbed every surface I could get my hands on. Every appliance was
sterilized  and sparkling. I had used bleach for the “first cleaning,” hot soapy water next, and the third time around, everything was scrubbed again; this time I used Lysol. I just couldn’t keep up and they were not going away. I called Dave and yelled at him again. “I have chills! You don’t understand…I actually have goosebumps having to do this, it’s SO GROSS!!! If I had a credit card I would get a Hotel. I WANT SOME RAID!” I would have gone to get some even though he said no, but my gas light was blinking.

Well, after the sixth hour of sucking up flying bugs, I noticed that the laundry room had smaller bugs then the rest of the rooms; I was pretty sure I was onto something: This was “a clue” of some sort.

Hmmm…. Babies! (Fruit flies can lay 500 eggs at a time, and their whole life cycle is only 10 days) OK, I was pretty sure I was on to something. I called Dave at work.
“Dave, I think I know the source.” The garage. “That Day” when my happy little daughter came leaping in, nonchalantly announcing “the fridge was not on.” Next I called my mom. She told me she had put some vegetables in that fridge after my oldest daughter’s college graduation party…three months ago! Mom wanted me to go out and look. Heck, no! I instantaneously called my husband back. I mentioned I needed to come home immediately and look in the garage. God Bless his heart. He did. Yep. Found the source alright. He wheeled the refrigerator to the end of the driveway; we went to town and bought 3 bottles of Raid. I only looked once. I saw frozen orange juice in what once was the freezer, and now is party-central for fruit flies. These flies were now EVERYWHERE outside. A full prison of escaped convicts. They was even a swarm of them on the outside of our house windows! I let him spray the Raid.

Today I am only battling around 5 fruit flies at a time. It helped almost immediately to find the source. Now we just have to figure out how to get rid of the massive refrigerator by the mailbox.